“All these neat little houses and all these nice little streets, it’s hard to believe there’s something wrong in some of those little houses.”
From the movie~All the Presidents Men
This quote has nothing to do with child abuse but it sounds like it does doesn’t it? There was a street in Grand Rapids, right there along with many others that housed family upon family. But it was in mine that abuse was taking place. There very well could have been others too. Manicured lawns, well-kept homes, middle class America…a breeding ground for abuse.
As long as there are people, there will be abuse, and there is no excuse for it. Zero reasons that make sense. Some say, “well they were abused so it makes sense they abused.” Hell no!!! Think about it, you were abused, terrified, wounded, used, degraded and you are gonna do that to your own child? No.
As long as there is mental illness, poverty, wounds, death and fear, there will be hordes of those paying for it in spades. What I endured is monumental, and it caused me to think out-loud yesterday. Having been abused so many years ago, how did I make it this far before I lost it mentally? How?
I will tell you. In my desperation I became a people pleaser, I was strong in myself and able to overcome disaster after disaster until it was beyond my ability to continue. I tried three different colleges with three different goals, I worked and struggled. I got in and out of relationships and marriages. I reached my pinnacle and quickly sabotaged it. Then came the meltdown that took place a few years later.
So now I am stranded in the middle of shark infested waters, floating on a leaking life raft. The abuse went underground, destroyed me from the inside out and left me a scattered man. Back to that quote…whats going on in your neighborhood?